Hey friends,
This weekend has been a little frustrating, and I’m finding it quite difficult to be polished and follow the specific format I’ve set up for this newsletter.
The main reason for my frustration is unknown - which is usually the case when multiple things add up - but I’m noticing a pattern to it and figured that could actually make it more relatable. This might end up saved in my drafts forever… unless I’m impulsive enough to press send at the end lol.
Several things, mainly around confusion about what I want to do with my life and how I’m taking care of my health, are contributing to this frustration. But I also find myself procrastinating as a result. I made pasta, cleaned the house, went out for three walks, and fast-forwarded through a movie (Coach Carter) on Netflix, then finished four episodes of Schitt’s Creek. What I wanted to do instead was figure out if I want to pursue an MBA, finish two scripts for my YouTube channel, write up a job description for hiring a video editor, and make a better thumbnail than the one I posted.
The difference from last year, though, is that I still got up early, finished editing the video, and typed up a newsletter - because I promised I’d write it biweekly and the thought of not dedicating time to my own project feels unacceptable in my head. Last year I would’ve delayed it and ended up in bed all day. Which makes me think: we can control our behaviour. For some people, it’s easy. For others, not so much - but clearly it’s possible for everyone. The thumbnail quality of both the video I posted today and this post is below par, I think, but at least I got it done, right? Fixing it can be a problem for another day. Procrastination is the killer of joy, but it can be overcome - and that realization has been like a breath of fresh air.
This post is just a way to let out my feelings while I still feel them strongly. And instead of doing that in my journal, I figured typing it out would be faster.
So, if I end up posting this (and regretting it later), let me know if you relate - and if you have any methods that help you reset on days that just don’t go as planned.
Shermeen
P.S. The one benefit of this frustration is that the newsletter only took 10 minutes to type because I just let everything out. Pretty effective, right?